Shear Genius: Finally! The Finale!

Shear Genius wrapped up this week and not a minute too soon. I was all gung-ho to watch SG when it started, but I soon got fatigued by the whole thing. Anyhoo....here' my final recap of the SG finale.

Since this was the big, big show, there was no need (or time) for a short cut challenge. Instead Rene Fris (hi, hi!) explained (in a way only Rene can!) the final challenge. Each remaining contestant got a lock of hair in either blonde, brown, or red, and they were told they would be telling the story of one woman's life at four different points along the way. They were to create a story for this woman that tells who she is at 18, 30, 45, and 60. They would have four different models and would need to create hairstyles for all four models in just three hours.

Charlie, Dee and Nicole had the entire night to figure out their storylines. I must say, its a good thing these three are stylists and not writers, because their character stories were a bit, well, thin.

Dee's story centered around a "rock star." At 18, she was trying to make it (I think--I didn't totally get what the 18 year old was supposed to be), at 30 she had released her first album, at 45? I can't remember what she was...a washed up one-hit wonder? Getting ready for her gig as clip-show commentator on Vh1? At 60, she was a grandmother who went by Mama Red. Ok...if you say so.

Charlie's equally lame story dealt with a movie star. At 18, she was transitioning from a child star to a full-blown actress, I think that at 30 she had won an Academy Award or Golden Globe or something, at 45 she was sort of resurrecting her career by starring in a Hitchcockian film, and at 60 she went on to direct her first film. I may have that mixed up, but does it even matter?

Oh, I almost forgot Nicole's storyline. Hers was about an 18 year old who didn't have a lot of money but was the "it" girl at school, at 30 she was working but fell in love, at 45 she "had more money" and a pack of kids, and at 60 she was a grandmother and proud of herself for being a good breeder. A teary Nicole admitted to an equally teary Jaclyn that her character was based on her mother. Aw! Trying to get sympathy points to cover the lack of creativity. How sweet.

I didn't think that any of the four sets of final haircuts was "shear genius." Dee's 18 year old's hair was sloppy looking and had extra strings of hair falling into the model's face. The judges loved it, but I am not entirely sure I would want styling advice from Kim Vo and his inflated lips. The rest of Dee's looks were blah but passable. Charlie did a few up-dos that made his models look like they were coming from a set from a 1950s movie. They were dated, not retro. And according to Vo, the 18 year old had a "hair burrito." That sounds entirely unappetizing. That leaves Nicole who's average, story-less characters had average, wow-less hair.

In a not so surprising move, Nicole was sent packing. Then the Shear Genius Angel announced that Crazy-Eyed Dee was the winner of Shear Genius. It was Charlie's title to lose and he officially lost it. I guess his boyfriend won't be getting a new nose after all!

So that's it. Dee's the Shear Genius winner, whatever that means. I say: Meh. Yawn. SG went out with a fizzle. Oh well...